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Archiver > GenChat > 1999-01 > 0915740996


From: <>
Subject: [GenChat-L] Urban Legend to end all Urban Legends
Date: Thu, 7 Jan 1999 15:29:56 EST


This is true! I know the guy who sent it to me. I know this guy whose
neighbor, a young man, was home recovering from having been served a rat
in his bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken. So anyway, one day he went to
sleep and when he awoke he was in his bathtub and it was full of ice and
he was sore all over. When he got out of the tub he realized that HIS
KIDNEYS HAD BEEN STOLEN and he saw a note on his mirror that said "Call
911!" But he was afraid to use his phone because it was connected to his
computer, and there was a virus on his computer that would destroy his
hard drive if he opened an e-mail entitled "Join the crew!" He knew it
wasn't a hoax because he himself was a computer programmer who was working
on software to save us from Armageddon when the year 2000 rolls around.
His program will prevent a global disaster in which all the computers get
together and distribute the $600 Neiman Marcus cookie recipe under the
leadership of Bill Gates. (It's true-I read it all last week in a mass
e-mail from BILL GATES HIMSELF, who was also promising me a free
Disneyworld vacation and $5,000 if I would forward the e-mail to everyone
I know.) The poor man then tried to call 911 from a pay phone to report
his missing kidneys, but reaching into the coin-return slot he got jabbed
with an HIV-infected needle around which was wrapped a note that said,
"Welcome to the world of AIDS." Luckily he was only a few blocks from the
hospital-the one, actually, where that little boy who is dying of cancer
is, the one whose last wish is for everyone in the world to send him an
e-mail and the American Cancer Society has agreed to pay him a nickel for
every e-mail he receives. I sent him two e-mails and one of them was a
bunch of x's and o's in the shape of an angel (if you get it and forward
it to twenty people you will have good luck but ten people you will only
have ok luck and if you send it to less than ten people you will have BAD
LUCK FOR SEVEN YEARS). So anyway the poor guy tried to drive himself to
the hospital, but on the way he noticed another car driving along without
his lights on. To be helpful, he flashed his lights at him and was
promptly shot as part of a gang initiation. And it's a little-known fact
that the Y1K problem caused the Dark Ages.

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